I can't believe that summer (more importantly, summer vacation) is upon us. I don't know what it was with this year, but summer just seemed like a vague idea, kept inside my cautionary mind for times when work was too boring. I just thought, "Wow, wouldn't it be amazing if it was real? But that won't happen, Neena. You can't enjoy yourself." It seemed like some sort of spiritual achievement, like nirvana or self-actualisation or enlightement (pick and choose). Just some sort of memory, something that even though we crave, we can't ever enjoy it for fear of overindulgence.
And today I felt the first sign that my dream is coming true. The smell of summer is spreading. It's the almost sickly sweet cherry popsicle, dripping all over your hands and running down your forearms while you scramble for napkins. It's the beer that gets spilled on your lawn or deck when you're out there with some good company. It's that kind of lazy, dusty, sunny smell after an afternoon nap. It's in the evening, when a storm is coming and the sun is setting; the air is sticky and humid and you just don't want to go.
I think the yearning is over. Something new has to begin. I have big plans to change my life this summer, even it means more time alone. I'm just a bit dizzy right now (no joke).
No comments:
Post a Comment